An open Letter to My GE Hotpoint Dishwasher

Dear Dishwasher,
You take in dirty dishes without complaint, saving my hands from the ravages of daily dish soap. I appreciate being able to store my dirty dishes in your racks so they don’t pile up in my sink. You do a generally good job of getting things clean, the glasses sparkle, the plates shine. It's not your fault the landlord didn't spend money on installing high quality appliances. So I hate to complain, but I just don’t understand why you have to make quite so much noise. The growlsh growlsh of the water swirling inside you, it could drive a person mad. So loud I can’t think, or at least I can’t sleep or read and have to turn the TV up really loud. If you had a timer I could set you to wash when I was out of the house but as it is I usually forget to start your wash cycle before I go out. I understand your need to show your power by spraying water as hard as you can, but try stopping to listen to yourself. It’s not just the volume, the wash cycle goes on interminably. Maybe you could be a little less ambitious, the dishes aren’t that dirty I do rinse them first. I don’t set you on power wash just nice normal wash. You can’t possibly need to spend that much time and energy on my dishes. I don't even cook so it's not like there's baked on grease. Couldn't you ease up a bit. I’m sure you’d last longer, I’d spend less on electricity and you’d be doing something for the environment if you could wash with less fury. Maybe I’d even run you more often, wouldn’t that be fun?